monday scare

it happened again.

today, while walking to work, i pondered abt getting another job. perhaps just get a 9 to 5 job, i thought.

then i felt that it would be a waste of my life to be mundane.

but i really felt the urge to go find another job. perhaps something more secure. with cpf etc. and to get back my old pay scale.

then i remembered that instant gratification is not wise. and that investment (in a profession) would take toil of some form. plus i crave for learning. i've always liked to be challenged.

then it happened again.

in the evening, my colleague had a meeting with me on one proposal that we're putting up.

it's a small but very nicely furnished taiwanese restaurant that needs A&P -- advertising and promotion. in the midst of anther CEO breakfast forum that we are managing for our client.

and i felt alive again.

i dont like this pattern of mine. monday scare.

what is it that i am afraid of? that at the end of my productive life i realised too late that ive given the weight overly to work and little to family (planning)?

nah. my life is what i create, isn't it?

hence, in the midst of my very busy day, i slot in time for "Desperate Housewives", CSI

and trips to the beach, gathering with friends etc. and when i am ready, a baby or two.